What are mature feelings and what is a mature relationship?
Unfortunately, Hollywood, books and our culture tell us what mature love IS, or worse still SHOULD BE!!
Looking back in life I see that my understanding of LOVE has evolved:
- Τhe Hollywood Love
The Kiss in the rain – Breakfast at Tiffany’s – this is everything we want.
However looking back, I think that this is more infatuation
- The love that completes you
This is more like love which we have been taught and one that exists since biblical times – you only feel whole or complete when you get married –two halves being ONE!!
Question: who can make you feel whole in a way that you haven’t felt before.
Answer: The answer to this questions for me comes from the next stage….. if you have made the right choice in loving the right man!!
- The love I can choose
For a happy lasting relationship you must choose each other every day….. even though nobody is perfect and there is no real PRINCE CHARMING … choosing eache other is important, but unless you are on the same page its completely useless.
- Mature love
This is it for me!!! When you have reached this stage then you have found it…. MATURE LOVE!!!
Its all the above and more………… feeling infatuated, feeling complete, feeling grateful each day that you recognize that you have made the RIGHT CHOICE and more…..
There are many palpable differences between mature and immature feelings/love and I have pinpointed the following:
- You are able to discuss anything and everything
- You respect each others need for alone time/personal space
- You respect each other
- You feel a tranquility that comes with absolute trust
- You focus on fulfilling your partner’s needs over your own
Giving, not taking is the purpose of a mature relationship!!
Still however there will be obstacles due to the routine and “hardships” of life. There will be disagreements, but the difference in a mature relationship is how you deal with these obstacles …………. And I vote: with dialogue and respect!!
Happy Valentines Day to all!!